August 21, 2019

President Obama Resorting To Card Tricks To Distract From Crisis

Washington, DC: President Barack Obama has started using parlor-style card tricks to distract the media and the public from the multiple crisis situations rapidly emerging in the early months of his second term.

During a press conference yesterday, Mr. Obama was in top “slight-of-hand” form. When pressed on the issue of the likely cover-up in the Benghazi terrorist attack that cost four American lives, the President turned to White House Press Secretary Jay Carney and said, “Now…and I want to be very clear about this…pick any card from this ordinary deck I just shuffled.”

In a follow-up question, Newsweek National Political Correspondent Dan Klaidman asked asked the President to comment on the IRS practice of targeting Obama’s political adversaries.

“Now Jay, I want you to put that card back in the deck, anywhere, but do not let me see you do it,” he replied.

When questioned on the recent revelation that Obama’s Department of Justice was gathering telephone records of hundreds of journalists during a period of the last election, Obama replied, “Now I am going to re-shuffle the deck.”

Responding to a final question concerning the deaths that resulted from Operation Fast and Furious, Obama flourished the two of diamonds from the top of the deck and incorrectly identified it as the card that Carney had selected.

[The preceding article is tagged and intended as satire]
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HUMBLE AUTHOR resides in the snows of Valley Forge, a place named in honor of that Most Hallowed Place where a handful of our fellow citizens once made an arduous, lonely, yet blessedly fateful stand. He is committed, through his own poor efforts, to provide a faint light for the way in this new darkness, and a few peaceful arms for the long battle that lies ahead.

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