Humble Author

HUMBLE AUTHOR resides in the snows of Valley Forge, a place named in honor of that Most Hallowed Place where a handful of our fellow citizens once made an arduous, lonely, yet blessedly fateful stand. He is committed, through his own poor efforts, to provide a faint light for the way in this new darkness, and a few peaceful arms for the long battle that lies ahead.

Obama, Biden Add Signatures To Declaration Of Independence

March 5, Washington, DC: In a formal ceremony held at the National Archives today, President Barack Obama and Vice President Joe Biden added their signatures to the Declaration of Independence. “Given the historic nature of my Presidency, I felt it...

Obama To Appoint Next Pope During Senate Recess

March 4, 2013, Washington, DC: President Obama will use the upcoming Senate recess, sometimes referred to as a “weekend,” to personally appoint the next Vicar of Christ. The new Pontiff will be the president’s 33rd recess appointment during the four...

First Lady Awards Husband Best Picture Oscar

February 24, Los Angeles, CA: Surprising Academy members and movie fans alike, First Lady Michelle Obama appeared at the end of the 85th annual Academy Awards to present the Oscar for Best Picture to her husband, President Barack Obama. Some...

Rules For Conservatives

Ladies and Gentlemen: In my letter of December 21, last year I proposed that we wade into the great contest for our future, restore the United States to its rightful condition as the “great political light” that it once was, and likewise restore our...

All The President’s "Men"

Ladies and Gentlemen: It appears that my Inaugural Pamphlet, poor as it may have been, has solicited some small measure of Enthusiasm on the part of its few readers and has, indeed, inspired one of them to put pen to paper. As a result, I am in...

A New Valley Forge

Ladies and Gentlemen, In this extraordinary time for our young Nation, when we are set upon by agents who would constrain our Liberty, abridge our Religious Freedoms, make laws contrary to the General Good, threaten our Livelihoods though...

Life Among The Living Dead

Things You Hear on the Radio as a Kid I was too young to go see George A. Romero’s seminal horror film, Dawn of the Dead, when it was released in 1978. But it still scared me. You see, I did hear the ads on the radio, and they were plenty scary on...

Altar Building for Dummies

3-D glasses may be cool, but you can get a beer at a ball game. I believe there are two types of people in the United States. There are “Sports” people and there are “Movie” people.  Sure, you can watch and enjoy both the Super Bowl and the...